Battle of the Barnyard: The Loudest Animal on the Farm

Presenting the contenders for the Loudest Animal on the Farm competition! 🏆🔊 From constant chatterboxes to full-on sirens, these barnyard vocalists take their job very seriously. Who’s your pick for the loudest? 👀👇

Welcome to the noisiest competition of the year! Move over, March Madness—this is March Loudness! 🏆 Today, we’re ranking the most ear-splitting, sleep-disrupting, farm-rattling creatures in a battle for the title of Loudest Animal on the Farm. Who will take home the crown (and possibly make our ears ring for days)? Let’s find out!

Honorable Mention: Maverick 🐶

Maverick does his fair share of barking, especially if he thinks something exciting is happening (like food or a rogue leaf blowing across the yard). But compared to the true barnyard noise-makers, he's basically a background singer in this chaotic choir.

5th Place: Fernando 🫏🫏

You’d think that donkeys would be quiet, but then you’ve never heard Fernando when he wants something. That bray can travel across the pasture, through the house, and straight into my soul. It’s like an air raid siren but somehow more dramatic.

4th Place: The Roosters (Jovi, Gus and Louis) 🐓🐓🐓

Ah, the roosters. The original alarm clocks. If you think they only crow at sunrise, you’re living in a fairy tale. They crow in the morning, at noon, in the middle of the night, when they see a bug, when they think they see a bug, and when they just feel like reminding the world they exist. Volume-wise, they’re strong contenders, but their crowing has more rhythm than raw power.

3rd Place: The Guinea Fowl (aka The Barnyard Gossip Club) 🦃🔊

Guinea fowl are the nosiest, most talkative creatures on the farm. They never stop chattering, squawking, honking, and yelling about things that may or may not actually be happening. Did a leaf move? ALERT THE TROOPS. Did the wind change direction? SCREAM ABOUT IT. But while they are constantly making noise, their volume doesn’t quite hit ear-shattering levels.

2nd Place: The Donkey-Sized Surprise (Fernando’s Bray, Part II) 🫏🔊

Yes, Fernando deserves a second mention because when he really lets loose, it’s like a freight train just discovered it has feelings. If you’re anywhere near him, you will jump. The sound waves might physically move you. And if it happens early in the morning? Let’s just say coffee isn’t necessary.

🥇 1st Place: Teddy the Moluccan Cockatoo—The Black Horse Winner! 🏆🦜

Did you think a little bird couldn’t take the crown? THINK AGAIN. Moluccan Cockatoos can be heard up to a mile away—and Teddy takes this fact very seriously. When Teddy decides it’s time for his voice to be heard (which is often), every living creature on the farm (and nearby) knows it. His scream is the kind of sound that makes your brain pause for a second to process what just happened. And then it happens again. And again. And again.

Final Ranking – Loudest to ‘Just Talkative’

1️⃣ Teddy the Cockatoo – Literal siren. Can call aliens.

2️⃣ Fernando (When He Feels Like It) – Emotional freight train.

3️⃣ Guinea Fowl – Noisy 24/7, but not peak volume.

4️⃣ Roosters – Reliable crowing squad, but less raw power.

5️⃣ Maverick – More reasonable volume levels.

Conclusion: Protect Your Ears

While the entire barnyard contributes to the daily soundtrack, Teddy reigns supreme as the loudest farm resident. So if you ever visit and hear an ungodly shriek from across the property—don’t worry. That’s just Teddy saying hello… or expressing an opinion… or possibly announcing the apocalypse.

Until next time, stay loud (or wear earplugs). 😉

🥇 TEDDY – The undisputed Loudest Animal on the Farm! 🎤💥